Well, the morning started out in a flurry. First of all, the past two nights I haven’t slept well at all – as in waking up several times and not falling back to sleep immediately. I think it’s because my bedroom is upstairs, it’s been close to 90 degrees the past couple days, and I’ve been keeping the house at 50 degrees at night (when I’m sleeping under the electric blanket), so it being so warm in my bedroom was a huge change that my body wasn’t used to. Unfortunately it’s going to get cold-ish again. Oh well. I did try to turn the air on this evening to cool things off before I went to sleep, but the air does not work at all, so there went that idea. I will call maintenance tomorrow and see if there’s anything they can do to fix it. Anyway, as a result of my sleeping problem I completely slept straight through my blaring alarms (well, one is really loud, the other isn’t quite so loud) – never even heard them. If I’m really tired, I really have a hard time with my alarms waking me up. Anyway, I had an 8am meeting at work, it takes a 43-47 minutes to get there (depending on how I catch the lights), and when I woke up it was very light, so I immediately knew something was wrong. I looked at my clock, and it was 7:06am!!! Wow! I leapt out of bed, washed my face, brushed my teeth, put my foundation on in record time, threw my hair into a ponytail, tossed on my clothes, grabbed the breakfast egg muffins I had wisely prepared for just such an emergency and a can of diet pepsi, and dashed out the door – at 7:17am – a mere 11 minutes after I woke up. I don’t even think I was fully awake. I made it to my meeting pretty much on time. Luckily it was a really informal meeting that I didn’t need to prepare for or anything.
When I got home this evening, I went to the Y, and did a very serious workout. I really worked hard on the elliptical – 62 minutes with an avg heartrate of 183 and burned 730 calories – I was really flying. It felt good to workout like that – I should do that more often! I think the extra sleep actually helped me there.
Now I have a confession (actually confessions) to make. Here’s the story:
- So on Tuesday, after having “fallen off the wagon” for a couple weeks, I recommit to Plan Number 333,200
- Then on Wednesday, I have a pretty good day, and decide to try a new approach for the next four weeks: Ditching the scale and the calories
- Well, on Thursday, I manage to do avoid my huge chocolate cravings but it’s extremely difficult and all I can do is just keep fighting with myself and barely struggle through
- Then on Friday things go much better, I avoid the chocolate and it’s not such a big struggle and I even turn down the boyfriend’s suggestion to go out for dessert and come up with a great healthy alternative
- Saturday comes and I make a great choice by avoiding the Midnight Truffle Blizzard at Dairy Queen and I don’t feel too deprived! I started to feel a little more confident
- If you noticed yesterday (Sunday) I really didn’t post anything about my day. I merely posted my menu plan for this week with no commentary. The reason: I went out of my to go to Dairy Queen and get a Midnight Truffle Blizzard. I decided that it had been a while since I’d had a treat, so I would have one. In retrospect, I still think that was an okay decision. One treat a week or so I think is reasonable and realistic. However, everyone had the same idea since it was such a warm day, and I had to wait in line at the drive-thru for over 30 minutes! I guess it serves me right. And while waiting I saw a lady who outside in the back of her pickup truck eating a blizzard herself and feeding an cup of ice cream with a spoon, bite-by-bite to her DOG!!! Unbelievable! I’ve never even heard of that. It was plain vanilla ice cream. That can’t be good for the poor dog! And with a spoon, politely eating a small, people-sized bite.
- Well, today, I have no excuse. I just plain gave in. While at Target buying my Lunchable (since I obviously hadn’t had time to pack any lunch this morning), I grabbed a white chocolate-almond-coconut-truffle, covered in dark chocolate candy bar (400 calories total). I told myself I would eat only a 1/4 of it. By the time the day was over, I had eaten the whole thing. When I got home, I ate a decent sized portion of a piece of chocolate cake, just because. Then I got a hold of myself, hightailed it to the gym, and worked as hard as I have in months and burned off 730 cals in 62 minutes. Feel much better and a lot more in control at the moment. But that still begs the question, how do I solve this fundamental problem. I definitely think this not counting calories is a good idea for me right now. I need to work on these fundamental issues of not giving in when I want chocolate/dessert/whatever without such a huge struggle every time – counting calories does nothing to help that – in some ways it just masks the problem, because, had I been counting calories today or yesterday, they would have been okay.
I feel like all this needs a better conclusion. I do have a plan which I will blog about later this week, but I have to go to bed now so I can actually wake up in the morning!