Post Number 200

This is post number 200 for me. You’d think I’d be writing some really encouraging post about how I’ve been doing so well and what not. Well, in the way of reflection, I’ll just say this. I am 21.2 pounds lighter than I was when I wrote post number one. That’s an average of 0.106 pounds/post – sounds like I need to get posting!

Anyway, there is really no excuse for my (dieting/exercise) behavior lately. None. Last week was a little rocky although I was still hanging on. It was the first week in a long time that I only worked out 3 times and didn’t meet my 225 minutes of exercise goal, although I did come fairly close. I bought that whole one pound box of chocolates. I skipped several days of the food journal. Sometimes I feel like once I get to the end of the day, I’ve eaten what I’ve eaten, so what good is journalling it going to do? I read almost no blogs and only posted a couple times. Although I was still trying to exercise and still eating okay-ish. Well I did even worse Sat, Sun, and yesterday. I skipped the workouts on Saturday and Sunday for absolutely no good reason – I just couldn’t motivate myself to do it. Then, I made a batch of cookies Saturday night. I was just really in the baking mood. Luckily I gave most of the cookies away but of course I ate the rest (in both dough and baked form) throughout the course of Saturday evening, Sunday, and Monday (yesterday). They’re gone now. I didn’t journal at all. I don’t know how many I ate, but somewhere in the 10-20 neighberhood. My calorie counts wouldn’t have been too horrible if I were journalling because I didn’t eat all that much else besides the cookies. I did, however, make one good decision yesterday. Despite being just completely exhausted nearly to the point of tears -you know, where you’re so tired, you just feel like you’re actually going to cry for no reason? But I exercised anyway. I went to the Y and went to my spinning class – burned nearly 500 calories! It was good for me to do something like that even though I wasn’t feeling good and even though I wasn’t having a very “on track” day.

The natural question is why have I allowed myself to do poorly this past week when I have been doing SO well and losing SO much weight? Well, first of all, I think I am suffering a little bit of burnout. I’ve been at it really intensely for six weeks. It’s natural to get a little burnt out. Also, I haven’t been taking hardly any time to do things that motivate me and help me refill that motivational tank – like reading blogs, posting on my blog, creating graphs, having discussions about it, etc. The other reason for this episode is that I have been so busy with so many other things lately that I just don’t  have the time and energy left to focus on my weight loss. But the thing about weight loss is this – there’s always going to be some urgent thing to get done that’s going to compete with my weight loss effort. Always. No immediate consequence is going to come if I skip a workout, or don’t take the time to measure or log my foods, or if I don’t read motivation blogs, etc – but other things competing for my time do have those immediate consequences. I need to refocus and realize that, yes, many of those other things are extremely important and a lot of them really must be done, but my health is too important to put by the wayside. I might not be able to give it 100% of my focus every day or every week, but I can and will give it the focus it deserves. One more thing about why I’ve done poorly the past week: Camp is coming up next week, and I know I won’t be able to exercise or count calories and high carb, high sugar, high calorie temptations will abound, and so I’m so afraid I’m going to undo some of the hard work I’ve done to this point. And it’s already starting to effect me now. That’s ridiculous. Yes, that week may be difficult. I’m going to do the best I can, of course, but something of a gain might be unavoidable, but that is absolutely no reason to give up NOW! I can still exercise now. I can count calories today. I can lose as much weight as possible until I leave on Saturday. I can and I will.

Okay, so on to what I’m doing now. First, I got a good night’s sleep which always helps a lot. I got up to go do my spinning workout, was up for about 15 minutes and was still tired, so I went back to bed. Now I feel much better, much more energized, and much more motivated. I will instead workout on the elliptical or possibly with a Cathe step DVD after work today. I made myself a healthy breakfast and I’ve already started logging my foods for today. As you can see, I’m blogging, and I’ve read a couple other blogs already. This afternoon, I’m going to take 15-20 minutes to sit to and write out a prioritized to-do list so I feel more in control for the rest of the week and so I know what I really need to get done and what can be left undone. Trust me, the “undone” list will be long. But this way I can focus my energies on my weight loss goals without worrying that I’m neglecting other things that have to be done.

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